How time can be really precious to the ones who really need it

It has been nearly 4 months since August 2017. Back then before our internal medicine exam start, time tu really rasa macam takde masa. Bangun awal, tidur lambat, minum bercawan coffee, sebab rasa takde masa. Banyak benda kena pulun, kena settlekan baca dan hafal. My eyes got swollen sometimes, ada dark circle siap (tapi tak permanent pun), i eat more junkies than normal sebab rasa takde masa nak masak proper meal (luls). Kitorang balik dari raya aidiladha terus duduk rumah 3-4 hari straight sebab nak baca buku. Serious nerd haha.

But nowadays after 4 months of battle, rasa macam dah tak heran dah dengan exam. One thing, maybe because kitorang pun dah pernah baca all those stuff before so perasaannya tak sama lah dengan waktu nak exam end round hari tu. I remembered the anxiety that i had back then, keluar rumah awal, bawak siap2 sarapan sandwich costa sebab semalamnya otlob tapi tak sempat makan malam tu, dan even before the exam started seriously takde selera nak makan. Sampai tertidur tunggu giliran dalam kelas kat wad19 tu. Maybe sebab risau sangat kot, maklumlah end round oral. Long case.

Comparing my life then with today, sekarang baru jam 8.30pm tapi dah buntu nak buat apa. Tak tahu nak baca apa dah. Bila tidur malam dah takde motivasi nak kejar bangun seawal mungkin or stay productive selepas subuh. Hmm.

Lalu aku merasakan betapa nikmatnya mempunyai tujuan dalam hidup. Bila kita ada something nak kejar. Really it's a bless. Kalau tak jadi lah lembik macam ni. Ayam lagi bersemangat berkokok waktu pagi daripada aku sendiri.

Really it is a bless.